2nd Transmission

[heavyweaponsbot]

...

Rodents are supposed to die when you step on them. What is the matter with these creatures!

[There are a series of loud stomps, followed by cursing. In many languages.]

Get away! Disgusting little beasts!

Comments

[stormcleaver.livejournal.com]

Don't step on them, fool robot!

[WHY ARE THEY ALL STUPID.]

[heavyweaponsbot]

[Ironhide says nothing, but, there is a pause...

... and then the dull thud of a stomping foot.]

[stormcleaver.livejournal.com]

[...Fine, then.]

Well, don't come to me to be fixed when they've chewed up your insides.

Idiot.

[Just further proof that robots are inferior to humans. Damn things can't even think logically.]

[heavyweaponsbot]

Have no fear, human. I have no desire to come to a kidnapping thug for anything.

[STOMP STOMP STOMP.]

/... threadjack s'up.

[catherine-b320.livejournal.com]

Then what, pray, are we supposed to do? If you offered solutions instead of insults, perhaps you'd find your captives more amenable.

[You hear that tone, Loe? That is the tone of someone who thinks you are a blithering idiot for keeping information from your 'soldiers'. Insubordination, thy name is.]

[heavyweaponsbot]

Save your breath, female. These humans have no desire to listen to us.

[talkingfishbone.livejournal.com]

Fire!

You set them on fire.

I just--I just tried it out. It totally works. It--

Oh Gods!

[He'll call you back when he isn't being chased by a killer bunny.]

[heavyweaponsbot]

Fire?

How do you know, boy!

[talkingfishbone.livejournal.com]

Because I just--

I told you, I just tried it! They die if you set them on fire. They run around a bit first, but then they keel over, just--do it.

[He's not usually so testy. He just doesn't like running for his life from a freaking bunny. His image didn't really need anymore damage.]

[heavyweaponsbot]

[Ironhide growls -- hold on, he has to shake some mice off his foot.]

I need my cannons for that! Where is this fire!

[talkingfishbone.livejournal.com]

There's--

There's torches? Ask one of the villagers--that's where I got mine.

[redhot-redeemed.livejournal.com]

They're obviously not normal rodents.

[And he's put two and two together. Fire kills the pests.

Guess who's not too thrilled about not being able to firebend right now?]

You have to burn them.

[heavyweaponsbot]

Obviously.

[How Ironhide can manage a dry tone through all this is a mystery.]

Need some napalm. Hmnf. Where can I find fire?

[When you're a robot, you don't really ever have to think about these things.]

[redhot-redeemed.livejournal.com]

You're in forest. Full of wood. Surrounded by torches.

[Fire on a stick, Ironhide. It's not that difficult.]

[heavyweaponsbot]

[He snorts.]

There is some satisfaction in... removing weapons from our captors.

[Meaning, he's going to just waltz up to the nearest villager and swipe a torch.]

[redhot-redeemed.livejournal.com]

[That's the spirit, Ironhide!

Or not.]

Or you could just get your own. You don't have to make them defenseless.

[infernaldork.livejournal.com]

[Eliot has not ventured outside, per agreement with Louis to lay low. This does not mean that he cannot listen to what's going on and feel frustrated that, without Lady Dawn, he cannot do anything.]

Maybe contain them?

[heavyweaponsbot]

How?

They are rodents. And they are swarming.

[infernaldork.livejournal.com]

With mus--

[Eliot shuts up before 'music' properly makes its way out of his mouth.

Lady Dawn. Powerless. Music, in that light, would make him look pretty silly.]

Do you have pepper or a hot sauce?

[In the realm of suggestions, that is the dorkiest that can come. No wonder Eliot suggested it.]

[heavyweaponsbot]

And what would that accomplish? Hmn?

[infernaldork.livejournal.com]

[That is a bit of clipped silence. When he speaks again, it is quieter, more assured, but darker in the slightest of undertones.]

It's a rodent repellent.

[shocksanglocks.livejournal.com]

Don't kill them, you big brute.

[heavyweaponsbot]

I will do as I see fit, in order to contain the problem.

[shocksanglocks.livejournal.com]

They are, like, totally not a problem! Just calm down.

[heavyweaponsbot]

... They are not a problem? Have you looked around?