IC INBOX || DEER TOWN

[heavyweaponsbot]

[There's a lot of beeping noises. Someone trying to push buttons and accidentally mashing down the entire keypad.]

[Several times.]

[Eventually there's a grunt--]

There. Now. Leave--

[BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP.]

Comments

glad i can claim this with prime dumb shenannies

[mrsnesbitt]

[looking back on this day later on, buzz will be astounded at the sheer amount of insane things he manages to get caught up in in this town in maine while just... minding his own business. isn't that mostly what happened with mami and fern? he was just trying to get his little plastic ass around and do some recon, and then both of those days ended with him having spoken to an actual living human...oids.

guess maine is just Like That.

he's been told about ironhide, but not his alternate mode. he figures it's just another car parked in the street (though maybe if he'd paid closer attention he would've noticed how much ironhide sticks out from the other 50s style cars around) which he's running up to the tire of to avoid being seen; old habits die hard. he's a couple blocks away from home for the day...

buzz hops up onto the footstep at the base of the door, standing still and pressing his back against the door itself to avoid the passerby. who has... no idea of either of them there. can't be too careful out in the big wide town!]

bless

[heavyweaponsbot]

[Ironhide wasn't kidding when he said he didn't have anywhere he lived. He just sort of parked on the street. Dozed off a little. Like the old man he really is. But he's finally back in his rightful form. And hell if he isn't going to park it, and get some decent recharge in.]

[So there.]

[Except then there's something scrambling around his tires. For Primus' sake, he'd thought there were no vermin daring enough to lurk around town. Minus the felines who patrolled the streets.]

[So... he does the only natural thing.]

[He starts shaking his plating. Like a dog trying to shed water.]

[mrsnesbitt]

[hey you know what he never expected to happen? THIS. EXACTLY THIS.

it would be nice to say he handles this well, and flips off the car them moves on with nary a problem. he does not. what actually happens is buzz is flung off it by an errant shake and he goes flying after a quick grouse of:] What the--?!

[he smacks on to the pavement face down as he's done many, many times before. a couple of his voice buttons are hit, creating oh-so-inelegant noise.]

To inf-- I am-- It's a secret mission, in uncharted space!

[buzz doesn't quite lock back into toy mode, but he sure does just stay face down. he's a nice PG lad, but the only thought going through his mind right now most certainly is what the hell?]

[heavyweaponsbot]

[Okay, but the voice going off? That's unexpected from what he assumes is something like a trash bandit, or walking roadkill. Things he has absolutely called raccoons and possums in the past. Thanks, NEST buddies.]

[It takes a lot to startle the old bot. But that ridiculous voice? Yeah, that does it. The engine kicks on, and the big truck hits reverse away from the source of the noise. Thankfully, he's not actually going to hit Buzz in the process.]

[NYOOOM.]

What. [There's probably supposed to be more of a question there, but whoops.]

1/2

[mrsnesbitt]

[this would've been a very short and gruesome thread if he had...

it's clear the truck isn't going to get anywhere near him, but buzz still flips onto his back and scuttles backwards like it is. sorry, ironhide, you're kind of terrifying? when the truck is back far enough, buzz actually realises it doesn't... have a driver. he stands up to get a better look, losing himself in his curiosity for a moment.]

[mrsnesbitt]

[and then ironhide's engine makes a noise that brings him back to reality and buzz locks into toy mode and topples over out of sheer terror.

thank you, truck monster.]

[heavyweaponsbot]

[Look, considering the truck has eyes (somehow), there is no way that scuttle isn't going to be noticeable. Even more so is the fact the scuttling, vaguely human-shaped object just suddenly went rigid and fell over.]

[Like one of those possum things he's heard so much about.]

[The truck sits silently. For a few more seconds. And then it abruptly stands up. It just unfolds. Sprouts a head and limbs. And eyes. There's groaning, creaking sounds, and Ironhide plants a hand on the ground to hoist himself to his feet.]

[Then he can lean in, to get a better look.]

... a small plastic man.

[ Clearly it's time to give the figure a poke. With a huge finger.]

Text; un: Reaper - October 25th

[no_reload]

Moira O'Deorain's birthday is on October 29th, as her mother was unsuccessful holding off her spawning to the better date of October 31st. No one's perfect, I suppose.

The point is that Moira will be having a party she is yet unaware of on the 29th, and you're considered a close enough association to earn an invitation. You're welcome. Details are as followed:

• Party will commence at 18:00 sharp. Don't be early.
• Wear clothing. Period.
• Bring your own alcoholic beverages of choice.
• If possible, bring a dish. If you don't know how to cook, don't bother. We don't want your store bought potato chips or pasta salads.
• If you have food allergies, there's no hope for you.
• Bring any and all humiliating stories of Moira with you. They will be shared in turns.

Respond here if you're able to attend. Don't respond if you're dead, insane, indisposed or uninterested.

text -> video

[heavyweaponsbot]

[Birthday?]

[Oh, right. The day the humans celebrated coming online, with burning pastry. Honestly, Ironhide could get behind the fire part. If the female is as old as she told him, there should be plenty of it there... however...]

[Wear clothing.]

[That actually gets an amused snort out of the old man.]

Very well. However... some of your requirements are not possible.

[And then, because he's a dramatic shit, he flips on the video.]

Such as clothing.

video

[no_reload]

[Reaper grudgingly turns on video as well, staring at the screen. He doesn't recognize this machine thing, but the voice was so familiar. He can't quite place it yet.

Instead, he grunts and shakes his head. Challenge accepted.]

What are your measurements? I'll sew you clothes so you fit in.

video

[heavyweaponsbot]

[Well that just makes two moments of amusement. Two! It's like a miracle.]

I will not even fit inside a building. [Is he laughing? Is that a laugh.]

I am not concerned with fitting in.

video

[no_reload]

[It sounds like metal on metal for some reason, but he's not about to question it. This 'friend' is clearly not human after all. No wonder Moira likes him.]

I'm deconstructing a wall to the house for you. It will be fine. You won't be left in the yard like a discarded dog.

House rules though. You need clothes if you're coming inside... or just laying on the outside looking in. I need your measurements.

video

[heavyweaponsbot]

You are...? Is the wall exploding?

[Oh boy. Oh boy that sounds like a party.]

It cannot get caught in my joints. Cloth always does.

delivered close to christmas

[gaylic]

[ ... Yeah he's getting a present too. Only inside the box that is probably too large, there's only a bumper sticker for his car form. Because Moira actually does have a sense of humor. ]

[heavyweaponsbot]

[ ... yeah, he'll just. Subtly put that somewhere. Probably on the inside of his tailgate.]

[Nice and out of sight unless you know what you're looking for.]

text UN: Ranger

[mrsnesbitt]

Good morning, Ironhide.
Did you get back from that city with everyone else okay?
Are you still in your natural form?

[heavyweaponsbot]

[What.]

[What is this. Why is --]



Yeah.

Why?

What happened?

[mrsnesbitt]

Nothing.
I just hadn't seen or heard from you in a few days.
I wanted to make sure no-one was left behind.

[heavyweaponsbot]

Have you checked up on all your people?

[Why is he "special".]

[mrsnesbitt]

Yes?
What does that have to do with anything?

text UN: tiger (misfire)

[phaseflex]

it's too bad she's not here
she could affirm proof that we did indeed use a planetary cannon to take out some chode's pleasure yacht
out of spite

[heavyweaponsbot]

What



Elaborate. What sort of planetary cannon?

[phaseflex]

the type nestled in a set of meteors and owned by a complete moron

[heavyweaponsbot]

Keep going.

You have my attention.

[phaseflex]

ceo of maliwan
he started a war on a planet full of civilians

so like any reasonable people, we turned his head inside out for it