13th Transmission

[heavyweaponsbot]

[There are dragging, scraping sounds as the comm clicks on, and they continue throughout the transmission.]

I require...

[A long pause, as if the next part is physically painful to say.]

... a mechanic. And a drink.

[The comm clicks off there, as the speaker continues hauling his broken old aft toward his quarters.]

Comments

[SPAMS WITH ACTION!]

[medicalofficer.livejournal.com]

[ It's his turn to look at the floor, not entirely sure how to respond to that. Without flat out lying, that is. ]

... It is not my intention to make you more uncomfortable.

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[heavyweaponsbot]

[He wants to tell him to get out. But every time he tries to form the words, he can't. He can only stare at him, his expression blank.]

...

Too late for that.

[He regrets saying that as soon as he finishes.]

[SPAMS WITH ACTION!]

[medicalofficer.livejournal.com]

Then I shall leave you be.

[ He turns for the door, fingers clenched into fists, annoyed at his own slip, moreso than Ironhide's behaviour. ]

[SPAMS WITH ACTION!]

[heavyweaponsbot]

...

[He'd like it if Megatron showed up right now... to blast him into tiny components.]

I am... sorry. I...

[So much he wanted to say. To apologize for--for not being what the other wanted, what he needed, for hurting him, for not being able to tell him he'd wanted it too... But couldn't.]

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[medicalofficer.livejournal.com]

You have nothing to apologize for.

[ He doesn't look at him, his tone stiff. ]

I should return to my quarters.

... Perhaps it is best we both forgot it happened.

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[heavyweaponsbot]

[He buries his face in his hands, nodding. The tone stings.]

... Yeah.

If... that is what you want.

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[medicalofficer.livejournal.com]

... It would be for the best.

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[heavyweaponsbot]

...

[He nods, shoulders hunching over. It's for the best. It's for the best.

So why does it hurt?]

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[medicalofficer.livejournal.com]

If... you no longer require me, I will take my leave.

[SPAMS WITH ACTION!]

[heavyweaponsbot]

... Whatever you think is best.

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[medicalofficer.livejournal.com]

... Clearly, my judgment is no longer trustworthy.

[ Yeah, he's just going to head for the door, before he makes this worse again. ]

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[heavyweaponsbot]

I...

Did not mean that...

[But he makes no move to stop him from leaving.]

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[medicalofficer.livejournal.com]

... You did.

[ Pauses at the door, still conflicted. He does not want the conversation to end on this note, but... What more can he say? ]

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[heavyweaponsbot]

Then, I apologize. Again.

[What more can he say? What more can he do?]

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[medicalofficer.livejournal.com]

If you feel that way, there is no reason to apologize.

A Medical Officer with compromised judgment is of little use to any 'bot.

[SPAMS WITH ACTION!]

[heavyweaponsbot]

Stop that! You... you are the only medic we have! You think I will really allow anyone else to treat me! Hmn!

This was my fault! Not yours!

[SPAMS WITH ACTION!]

[medicalofficer.livejournal.com]

Others may be trained.

Stop blaming yourself! You are being a fool.

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[heavyweaponsbot]

[You know what? Frag this hip - he pushes himself onto his feet, to better glare at him.]

I do not want others! There is only one I want.

[... a statement which eerily paralleled other, non-medical sentiments as well.]

So are you!

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[medicalofficer.livejournal.com]

[ He meets his glare with a questioning look, only partially surprised by the outburst. ]

You are being stubborn.

If you are uncomfortable with me, then I fail to understand why you would want me to work on you.

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[heavyweaponsbot]

[He leans against the wall, since it's the only thing in the vicinity to support his weight.]

No. I am not. None of... no one else is as capable as you are. No one.

... Not... uncomfortable with your work. I... [He takes a long pause. And when he speaks again, he's quieted.]

I... need you.

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[medicalofficer.livejournal.com]

And ignorant. Another medic could take my place, with training.

...

You will find another, more suitable for the position.

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[heavyweaponsbot]

Stop this! Stop! What... what is the matter with you! I never said that!

No! I do not want another medic!

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[medicalofficer.livejournal.com]

What is the matter, is that the very idea I could actually care about you makes you uncomfortable.

Personally, I would prefer my friends to have a better outlook than to think that their eventual death is going to make me incapable of functioning.

[SPAMS WITH ACTION!]

[heavyweaponsbot]

... then stop speaking that way! If you care, as you say. Stop that. At once.

Would it not? If you were... too close? Tell me, then. What would happen.

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[medicalofficer.livejournal.com]

...

I would do everything in my power to keep you functioning. At any cost.

Just as I would for any who I cared for, friend or otherwise. The same would be said for Prime, or any of the others.

Eventual death is inevitable. You cannot function based on the fact it will one day come to an end. I will do what I can to prolong that date for as long as possible - but I would prefer to have happiness in the time that I have.