heavyweaponsbot | 3rd Transmission

I--

Um.

[Xanth swallows hard.]

D-Do you... do you know, h-how there are s--some people h-here who w-we knew, but... d-don't... know us a-- at all?

I... I-I don't know h-how, but, that-- I-- m-might've been th--that way.

[He wishes he could explain it, but he doesn't understand it himself.]

... Yeah. I know that.

[He doesn't really know what to say to that. Or... what to think of it. So he falls silent for a while, turning that over.]

Oh.

I... guess that is our only explanation.

Y...Yeah.

[Xanth is boggled, too. He believes people when they say they met another him, but the idea that he was here previously is very hard to wrap his mind around.]

B-But I'm... I-I'm here now, the-- the me y-you know, and, th-that I know. S-So I don't get it.

B-But I, I thought, m-maybe that w-would help...

It... is good to know.

[He's just not sure how, though. Aside from... if there were another Xanth, who wasn't from the Elegante... did that mean his world wasn't actually gone?]

Did you hear anything about him? About his world?

J-Just a-- a l-little bit. Th-that he was... n-nervous, that-- that he w-wasn't really... v-very ex--experienced.

B-But I didn't hear a--a l-lot. If he was r-really like me, th-then he'd... p-probably not t-talk much, a--about his w-world.

[If he were truly like Xanth, he would have tried to forget.]

Something wrong with your world?

[You know, besides the OBVIOUS.]

[Xanth lets out a tiny laugh, but it's nowhere near a happy one.]

Just-- I-- I-I didn't f-fit in, s-so well. And if... i-if was l-like me, then... I-I bet he d-didn't either.

[Have you ever wondered, Ironhide, where all of Xanth's neuroses come from?]

You never told me of this.

[... not really. This is Ironhide we're talking about.]

[It's not like he purposefully hid his past before now. It's just that so few people ever seemed to ask...]

Um.

W-Well.

I-I can explain, but, not-- n-not on-- th-the journals.

[Even if he's not hiding it, he doesn't want to spill everything out in public.]

You want to go somewhere?

Y-Yeah. Um.

[He thinks for a few seconds. He'd rather not go to his room; getting some fresh air would be nice.]

Th-- the, uh. The-- lake? I-Is that-- a-alright?

[He likes the lake. It's almost the ocean.]

Yeah, sure. I will meet you out there.

O-Okay.

[Tucking his journal away, Xanth heads out to the shore. He's not looking forward to this; recounting his life before is not altogether pleasant, and he was so, so pathetic. It was shameful, and Xanth very much does not want to tell Ironhide anything shameful.

But he's Ironhide. He deserves to know.

Xanth moves quickly, but he came from his room and that's a fair distance from the lake. He wouldn't be surprised if Ironhide had already made it.]

[Xanth, you overestimate the abilities of old soldiers with bad hips and stairs in the way.]

[Since he can't drive out of the keep, he has to limp his way down the stairs and out of the doors. Only when he's clear does he actually transform and ~~roll out~~ drive out to the lake.]

[Well maybe he'd been outside already. Xanth couldn't be sure.

He offers a smile and a wave when he finally sees Ironhide roll up. He'd settled himself down on the edge of the lake, watching the waves roll in and out. It was calm lake, but it was enough to keep Xanth's attention.]

[With a grunt, the truck proceeds to transform near the water, but not too close. Rust is still a concern of his, after all. Especially considering he'd just driven through salt water... and... considering Ratchet wasn't here.]

[He limps up to the boy, standing just behind him to see what he's looking at.]

[Nothing much. The water is blue and clean and the waves are gentle. Xanth is far enough from the water that Ironhide, too, could settle there and not get wet.

He knows water is bad for metal. He'd be a fool not to.]

I-I wonder, y-you know, if... th-there's anything d--down at the b-bottom. S-Sunken treasure, or, y-you know. S--Something.

[He stays standing. It's perfectly comfortable for him like this. Crouching might hurt.]

[At the comment, though, he grunts, shaking his head.]

There is dirt. And weeds.

[See, Ironhide? Sunken treasure!

Still, the absolute frankness gets another smile out of Xanth.]

A-And, um. Rocks.

[There's a moment where Xanth falls silent. He chews on his lip, unsure of what to say next.]

Sorry. I-I, uh. I-- I guess I'm just-- n-not really sure wh-where to... t-to start.

[Only Ratchet thinks of dirt as treasure -- wrong Autobot, Xanth.]

Yeah. Big ones. They get stuck in your undercarriage until you transform.

[He falls quiet too, waiting. When Xanth speaks again, he just grumbles something in Cybertronian.]

I have time. Speak up whenever you feel like it.

O-Okay.

[He's quiet for another few seconds, gathering his thoughts. He shifts his legs, drawing them up closer to his chest and wrapping his arms around them. It's a comfortable position for him; he feels safe.]

I-I... n-never met m--my parents. I-I lived with... w-well, she, sh-she wasn't m-my actual g-grandmother, b-but I... I-I always c--called her that. Sh-She told me that... m-my mom couldn't k-keep me, but she... n-never said why.

B-But I... I-I think it's 'c-cause I'm not... I-I'm don't... h-have any m--magic.

[That fact still stings, even after the last year, but it's surprisingly easy to talk about.]

[He shifts closer when Xanth curls up. He's only half aware of it, most of him just waiting for the boy to speak.]

[What he says... is confusing, though.]

Is that a problem? Neither do I.

[He'd never even heard of 'magic' until the Elegante.]

[Xanth laughs nervously.]

It's-- a-a big problem, o-over there. S-See-- I'm-- a-an elf. I-I think. I, well, I-- I look l-like one. L-Like a... n-night elf.

A-And they're s-supposed to have... l-lots of magic, like, m--more than... e-everyone else. I-I don't know, I-- I-I didn't l-live with them. I-I was, um... a-adopted, by a-an Atlian. Th-they're still elves, b-but not night elves.

S-So I, um, I-- I-I stuck out like... l-like a sore thumb.

[Or like the only little boy with white hair in the entire city.]

[This prompts a long look from Ironhide. He tilts his head.]

You look human to me.

[He's not trying to demean what Xanth is telling him. It's just his observation.]

[He pauses though, turning this over in his head.]

And... they were less than approving of your presence?

[It's alright. Xanth knows Ironhide can't see the differences; they're minor enough as it is.

He nods.]

Y-Yeah. My family, m-my, uh-- a-adopted family-- th-they were okay with it. But. N-Night elves, they're-- usually w-w--weird enough, like-- th-they never leave their own c-country. A-And there's a-- a lot of rumors, b-but I don't... kn-know if they're true.

S-So the fact that I-I was o-out of there a-at all was... w-weird. A-And then when-- w-when I m-might as well b-be human, it's just...

[Xanth rubs his cheek and sighs.]

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